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A Respectful Request from Sally

2/7/2017

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Sal has a rapidly spreading malignant cancer and wishes to keep the specifics private. PLEASE do not send any more suggestions for remedies even though well meaning or your beliefs about the reasons for her illness.

Sal is not seeking remedies at this stage and has very consciously chosen a combination of allopathic and complementary care. She has exceptional professionals attending her.

I too am being inundated with remedies and theories and although I do everything in my power to provide comprehensive updates I’m being called and messaged for answers that I’ve already clarified here. PLEASE read my messages and those on Sal’s page before contacting me. 

Although both Sal and I have been as direct and honest as possible I feel some people still refuse to see how gravely ill she is. She can scarcely eat, walk, sleep, and at times talk. She’s exhausted and cannot receive any more visitors. She has to take pain relief medication constantly.

I know Sal better than anyone and know the love, compassion, humility, and forgiveness that motivates her. Her deep understanding of people, and wanting to assist in their healing and well-being, and indeed elevating every interaction she has with them is a gift to those with the mindfulness to see.

Sal says that whether she lives or dies she wants to be CELEBRATED, so I implore everyone in your alone times or in conversations with friends to
* Celebrate Sal in your unique way
* Discuss her qualities and what she has meant and means to you
* Create celebratory fundraising events for her immediate and ongoing health care
* Send pure love and healing energy to allow Sal to utilise in whatever way she chooses

Blessings and courage and we navigate these changes.
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​Sallie-Ann Macklin writes

I too had this issue this is a post I made on the same issue - hope it helps ...
ADVICE - this is a really tough one. Difficult to discuss, so many different points of view and passion about this topic that it makes for many emotions.

So all I can do is share how it was for me. Before CANCER - In the past I was homeopathically treated - my whole life. I have always been herbal and alternate until I started to get skin cancer. 

When I was diagnosed with Grade 3, Her2+ breast cancer - 5cm tumour I was under a time pressure to decide which way forward. In the past I had told myself I would never do chemotherapy. 

Now I was faced with options.
Paul and I have for many years trained leaders, coaches, teams in exploration of ideas and so I applied the model that we use in training to research. 

I spent the first 3 weeks of my diagnosis having tests done, reading books, finding out what I could about my personal cancer, I spoke to women who had bilateral mastectomies. I wanted to speak to them about the trauma of having their breasts removed, how did it feel as a women to no longer have breasts. I had to look at all avenues, look at everything about this cancer journey that could impact me on all levels of my being. It WAS INTENSE.

Can I be really clear here there are different cancers - I had no idea - over 200 different forms of breast cancer and they are treated differently! Some can be cut out immediately, some like mine, if you cut it, it multiplies like a wild fire - spreads through your body. My aunt died at 37 from this breast cancer. 

ADVICE - came from everyone and everywhere - it is a huge machine this cancer phenomena - make no mistake. We ALL have an OPINION we have all been touched by it - in one way or another.

At the end of the day - usually we are dealing with each other - family, friends, loved ones - 1:1. When someone has cancer and is on their path - my cry to you is please don't give them your advice UNLESS they ask YOU. Listening is the greater gift you can bring them. Listen to their concerns, their fears, their options. Helping them to explore their options and then once they decide on THEIR path, supporting them and loving them through their journey is the greatest gift you can give to them. 

Being told that I needed to stop eating dairy wasn't helpful for me or my cancer - my cancer isn't affected by hormones but some are - I agree - but not mine. So then when I am given that advice - I have to go and find out if that is true, there is more distress and more emotions to seive through - it is exhausting.

I know when we love someone we really want to tell them what helped us, is helping us, could help them, I realise this need comes from a deep desire of LOVE. I used to as well, thought I new everything! I'm ashamed that I was so bloody opinionated!

SEEK TO UNDERSTAND. As the delightful soul Stephen Covey said - "Seek to understand then be understood" however, in this case the FULL STOP after UNDERSTAND matters and my advice to myself is LISTEN because this is LOVE. 

Listen to the soul in front of you, perhaps they just need a shoulder to cry on, bounce around some ideas, be angry, be afraid, whatever it is, it is about helping them walk through their journey on their terms - perhaps they even want to RAGE and then your job is to allow them that as well.

Of course, this is still my point of view and my opinion. Having gone through a year of cancer and many ideas on how I should deal with it, I know I have made the right decision for me, for now. As I have said many times before this has been the hardest year of my life but turning out to be one of the best years in my life. 

It has stripped away pretense, 
It has stripped away what I thought I needed, wanted or had to be. 
It has stripped me bare to a core in me that I hadn't touched.
It has hurt.
It has been incredibly painful.
Emotionally it has been a roller coaster.
I have changed and I am still trying to embrace those changes, how I look, how I feel, how I am in the world.

My prayer today is to tread lightly.
Love fully.
Embrace all my emotions.
Be gentle.
Listen well.
Have an amazing day my friends. 
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